is it consider cheating?

YM_gurl

sarNie Oldmaid
if your bf/gf goes clubbing without telling you? is that cheating or more of lying && not telling you the truth.


and what if your friends saw him/her dancing with someone? how would you take it? would you break up him/her???

if you were in this situation, what would you do? -_-
 

rukmos

sarNie Adult
If he only goes clubbing with friends without telling you then I consider it lying and maybe signs of cheating.

If he's dancing with some other chicks then I would consider it cheating in my view. If he's not cheating, why won't he tell you that he's going clubbing.

If i was in this situation, I would talk to him and get both sides of the story out and then decided whether to believe him or kick to the cub.
 

Liberty

sarNie Adult
It depends on the indiviual but no, that's not cheating. I don't see how it would be, he's not doing anything wrong.
Clubbing is just clubbing and he's only lying IF YOU ASKED and he said he wasn't going but he really did.
If he goes somewhere and doesn't tell you in advance there's nothing wrong with that, he's his own person afterall.
My bf always tells me where he's going but that's only because we live together. If we didn't he probably wouldn't and I wouldn't ask because I don't have to know where he's at 24/7.
As for dancing with another person, it's just dancing. Of course if he's grinding his piece into some girl then yeah, I'd be annoyed but I'd talk to him about it and tell him how I feel. It's not something to break up over if you're in a mature relationship.
My bf goes clubbing with his friends almost every Saturday (his BFF is single and lives alone, the guy gets lonely). I never go because I'm not the clubbing type and I can't stand the music they play.
But I trust my bf and knows he wouldn't do anything to disrespect me and yes, I'm fully aware he'll be dancing with other girls because I see the pictures afterward, usually. It's all harmless and most of them are his female friends I've met (who have bfs of their own).
Guys don't like clingging women. Hell, women don't like clingging men.
Just because you're with someone doesn't mean you own him/her, you guys are still two separate people with your own lives.
That's something not many people understand and it leads to unnecessary drama and breakups.
 

judyp

sarNie Adult
It depends on the indiviual but no, that's not cheating. I don't see how it would be, he's not doing anything wrong.
Clubbing is just clubbing and he's only lying IF YOU ASKED and he said he wasn't going but he really did.
If he goes somewhere and doesn't tell you in advance there's nothing wrong with that, he's his own person afterall.
My bf always tells me where he's going but that's only because we live together. If we didn't he probably wouldn't and I wouldn't ask because I don't have to know where he's at 24/7.
As for dancing with another person, it's just dancing. Of course if he's grinding his piece into some girl then yeah, I'd be annoyed but I'd talk to him about it and tell him how I feel. It's not something to break up over if you're in a mature relationship.
My bf goes clubbing with his friends almost every Saturday (his BFF is single and lives alone, the guy gets lonely). I never go because I'm not the clubbing type and I can't stand the music they play.
But I trust my bf and knows he wouldn't do anything to disrespect me and yes, I'm fully aware he'll be dancing with other girls because I see the pictures afterward, usually. It's all harmless and most of them are his female friends I've met (who have bfs of their own).
Guys don't like clingging women. Hell, women don't like clingging men.
Just because you're with someone doesn't mean you own him/her, you guys are still two separate people with your own lives.
That's something not many people understand and it leads to unnecessary drama and breakups.
well said. :) but i have to admit, that i was a bit upset that my bf once went to the strip club with all his single horny friends. but i got over it because he wasn't doing anything wrong but shooting pool at a strip club. afterall, he did tell me about it and he didn't have to. and i respect that more than anything.
 

KhoOnxNouxWanxJai

Staff member
Ahh ok this I would have to say more like lying unless you have proof that something else was going on
honestly if it were me I wouldn't be mad because my husband does tell me wherever he goes and I knew he was a flirt before we even dated .. and he is like that he's a friendly guy that tends to flirt without noticing it but the weird thing is im like that too? LOL with girls and guys in my situation. The thing is that he would never do something to hurt me because he risk losing me and everything else he owns half of it lol just kidding but anyways he knows because he risk losing me and I'm the only woman on this gawd darned planet that can stand him. He also knows how hurt I'll be and he most definitly never want to see me hurt. The one time he made me cry and some other things happened he nearly died because I didn't talk to him for days. But the thing is that with every relationship comes jealousy. Hell I mean sometimes I do get bothered and jealous but I don't express it in a way where he'll be like gosh why is she triping .. I tend to be more silent and if I can't take it for reals then I'd talk it out ..

So the best thing for you to do is talk it out and tell him how that bothered you and you don't want to sound posessive but if he is going to do something then tell you the truth and not lie about it ..
if you think about it I mean did you ask him? And did he tell you he did something else?
Cause lying would be more like "What did you do?" "hung out at home" thats lying
but if you didn't ask and he didn't tell then thats more like he didn't tell you which is completely different from lying.

I think you just need to take it easy and trust him.. sometimes guys don't tell their girls because they know how their girls are ... like I never told my ex when I hung out with my guy friends because he'd get all emo and like start talking about how "oh im scared that you might find him more attractive then me and leave me blah blah" so I tend to start hiding things but thats not a way to have a relationship
talk it out is the best route
I wish you luck!
 

Liberty

sarNie Adult
well said. :) but i have to admit, that i was a bit upset that my bf once went to the strip club with all his single horny friends. but i got over it because he wasn't doing anything wrong but shooting pool at a strip club. afterall, he did tell me about it and he didn't have to. and i respect that more than anything.
Speaking of strip clubs my bf does that too but his single friend (the same one that takes him clubbing) takes him. It's funny because they go for the buffet. :lol: I thought he was kidding but he said the food there is really good, an entertainment magazine here even listed the top best buffets at strip clubs and it's the same one that he and his friends go too.
Every time he goes he tells me about it, he even asks me to come but I told him I'd go to a strip club when he goes with me to a male strip club. ^_^
 

YM_gurl

sarNie Oldmaid
thanks girls.

well, i ask him if he went clubbing. he said no. && then later on. he admit it..
i mean if he was to ask me, i wouldnt had care cause i know him already.

he's the type that goes out. but he didnt tell me. so there, i blame him.
And because wherever i go, he ask me all the time so i call it fairness. haha

Btw, we didnt see each other for two weeks && when he came to town, he went clubbing.
isnt that messed up?!!! -_-
 

judyp

sarNie Adult
Speaking of strip clubs my bf does that too but his single friend (the same one that takes him clubbing) takes him. It's funny because they go for the buffet. :lol: I thought he was kidding but he said the food there is really good, an entertainment magazine here even listed the top best buffets at strip clubs and it's the same one that he and his friends go too.
Every time he goes he tells me about it, he even asks me to come but I told him I'd go to a strip club when he goes with me to a male strip club. ^_^
lol. thats funny because my bf told me 'we should go together' and i told him 'yeah, sure, to a male strip club'. ^_^

thanks girls.

well, i ask him if he went clubbing. he said no. && then later on. he admit it..
i mean if he was to ask me, i wouldnt had care cause i know him already.

he's the type that goes out. but he didnt tell me. so there, i blame him.
And because wherever i go, he ask me all the time so i call it fairness. haha

Btw, we didnt see each other for two weeks && when he came to town, he went clubbing.
isnt that messed up?!!! -_-
well in that case, if he initially said no then later admitted, then he lied to you. it could be because he doesn't know how you might feel (given that he's supposedly in town to see you but instead, he went clubbing) or he has something to hide.
 

7270

7270
lol. thats funny because my bf told me 'we should go together' and i told him 'yeah, sure, to a male strip club'. ^_^
:loool:

no. i'd probably not tolerate my girl going to a club and grinding up on some other dude. why does she need to go clubbing anyway? if she wants to "hang out" with her friends, she can do that elsewhere. <_< if she told me and i told her "yes" to go, that's another thing, but i doubt that i'd even agree. if she wants to go and be moral support for her friends to hook up or whatever, i don't see why we can't go together.

one of my friends let his girl go clubbing. they probably talked about it 2-3x. next thing the girl is pregnant with some other dude's baby. that relationship lasted for years.

i don't think your dude cheated, but it sounds like he's considering branch swinging. anyway, why did he go clubbing without you? were you busy?
 
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