Please give me advice on what to do next :c


sarNie Egg
Okay, I've been friends with my best friend for so long... for about 6 years. We're super close and we know each other's secrets. Both of us have strict parents so strict we barely hang out. I can't hang out with friends so it's hard for me to make friends. Plus, my parents think the ideal teenager doesn't need friends and just needs to succeed in school. My friend's parents are the same yet I believe they're more strict.

My friend has been grounded lately because she's been talking to a guy. My friend's brother has a girlfriend and her parents are fine with it but whenever my friend talks to a guy even if it's just a friend, they act like they slept together or something. It's just beyond. Also, the guy my friend's talking to is actually nice. He's kind and he actually sees her in his future. He's honest and he would never harm her. He worries about her just as much as me.

I haven't been able to talk to my friend recently since she's been grounded and her parents go on her facebook to see who she talks to so I can't talk to her on there. I went on email and emailed her. She replied back and then I emailed back only to see that her parents emailed me on her account. In the email, they were basically saying "if your friendship with our daughter starts to have problems with our family, then we ask you to stop it."
WTH is that supposed to mean? I have never thought of leading my friend into a bad direction. I'm always supporting her and cheering her up from her strict parents. I feel as if I am her only hope.

I tried calling her today but I knew that if I called, her parents wouldn't let me talk to her so I told my sister to talk on the phone. They just hung up when they heard my sister's name since they didn't know her.

Also, on facebook, my younger sister is friends with my friend's younger brother. My friend's younger brother has blocked my sister so now my sister is losing a friend because of me ... ??????
I feel like it's all my fault and I should be helping my friend but how. I can't even drive to her since I can't drive. I can't go to her house since she moved far away and my parents won't let me go.

The guy that's been talking to my friend knows her password so he went on her facebook and saw that she blocked me, him, and a bunch of other people that are friends with me and her. I'm pissed, super pissed. I also saw that my friend's mom posted a status saying, "Please help me get through my daughter's teenage years. Please."
I was like WTF? You're taking too much control of your daughter's life..

Please help me and tell me what I can do. I feel so useless and I feel like my friend is calling for my help. My best friend and I are planning to go traveling in the future -- all around the United States, to Korea, and to Thailand. I don't think I can see my future without her. She's my best friend and has been beyond a best friend. She's like my soul sister. She's like another parent. She's like a part of me that I can't lose.

Cupid Candy

sarNie Coma
Awww thats sad to hear, but from hearing out your situation I don't think you can do anything about this. You gotta just wait the situation out and see what happens next. If you do end up seeing your friend, ask her what you should do with your friendship.


sarNie Egg
Thanks so much for the advice.
What I'm planning to do now is to get hold of her somehow by sending a message to her friend at school so he can give it to her at school so her parents won't get hold of it. I'm just scared she'll be manipulated by her parents and be the "good daughter", they daughter they want her to be. Although, I'm confident she'll get through. She's strong.

Thanks again.

Cupid Candy

sarNie Coma
Your welcome, just remember, if you are fated to be friends then you won't ever be apart. Always stay strong and fight til the end.


sarNie Juvenile
first of all i have to say this is some crazy shit like wth?

so you guys don't go to the same school? and why does her parents dislike you personally? i would email her parents back stating where i stand because they're accusing that you're causing problems for their family. if you didn't do anything wrong those are false accusations. this won't do much since they'll still be hard-headed, but we all don't like it when people accuse us of something we did not do!

other than that there's not much to do since it's up to your friend to decide whether or not she still wants to be friends with you. you guys might have to wait til you're 18 or until you're able to support yourselves before you can do what you want. don't worry time flys by really quickly. but yeah like what cupid said, if you do see her, ask her what to do with their friendship.

but if anything goes too far, like if there are any signs of her harming herself or anything, you should get help.


sarNie Oldmaid
I believe you are a great friend for not giving up despite what's going on. Some parents are strict because they tend to over think and believe they know best. Though by hiding and controlling their child, it wouldn't be a good thing at all. How can the child feel safe to try new things, to meet someone, or to set their own life without someone telling him/her how to do it. Everyone needs to have a life that's their own, in other words freedom. All you want to do is be her friend, what's the big deal that they won't allow that. In life we need people to communicate with, or at least just one close friend. I feel really bad, and wish I can be a fairy and make everything better but the best advice I can give is to not give up, but just becareful not to make the situation worst for yourself or your friend. Who knows what her parents might do to her. I hope everything goes well, and think hard before making a decision. And trust me your not causing problem for the family, the parents themselves are going way too far. Sometimes we look for others for advice, because parents are parents not our friends. Wish you and your friend best of luck and eventually things will get better, if not DON'T GIVE UP! :wink:


sarNie Oldmaid
Wow, sorry to hear that. You seem like a great friend and a great person. However, at this point there's really not much you can do since her parents have blocked all their daughter's communications. They are the ones causing "problems for the family" not you. You are just doing your job as a best friend whom cares and worries. I hope your friend's parents would loosen up, controling your daughter's social networks is just too much. I hope the best for you both, I hope your friend can fight for her freedom.

p. Zoua

sarNie Oldmaid
WOW that is sad...

Some kind of parents!?! well, you can't really do much at this point since you're an outsider. It's all your friend's family problem. It all depends on if your friend is strong enough or not. Sometimes, what is only stopping yourself; so it depends on if your friend is a strong person or not, she can break through one day. I mean this doesn't mean she got to go around not listening to her parents at all, she can still be with them and listen to their words and advices, but that doesn't mean she has to follow them. It's hard specially if you're a girl. Best of luck.


sarNie Egg
@rakcharm: This is crazy, so crazy I can't even believe it's happening to me. We used to go to the same schools until she moved away a year ago. Her parents never disliked me before. Her mom even let me call her Auntie but now it's different. I don't think I did anything wrong.
When I got the message from her parents, I just simply replied back in a nice way for them to let their daughter have more freedom. They acted as if I was calling them bad parents. After that, they never replied to my email so they must have ignored it.

@ThaiMoveLiver: Thanks, it's just sometimes I don't feel like a good enough friend but thanks. Agreed, although I think this isn't even considered caring. I don't even think the parents are caring about my friend anymore since they obviously won't let her have friends or let her follow anything she wants. Thanks so much for the advice. I won't give up!

@Cee_Neron: Thanks. I guess so. I'm just going to wait and see what will happen. Thanks so much for giving me advice :)

@p. Zoua: I believe my friend is strong enough but her parents can be manipulating and lead her to ignored me and her other friends. I don't want her to be a friendless person and have no bright future. Agreed, thanks.

Thanks everyone for the great and helpful advice. I won't give up, I surely won't. All in all, my friend doesn't deserve this. She's always caring about her parents and considering their feelings before hers. She's a 4.0 student who can't even get an A- . She's a perfectionist, she can draw amazingly, and can sing awesomly. She's an amazing person that I won't give up on. Thanks again :)