what does he want from me?

ok so i was dating this guy anh and we started off as friends we've been friends for a year and a half before we started dating... we started dating in sept of 08 and after the first week he was like oh i think we should just be friends and i was like what? and he said it's cause he wants to see me all the time and talk to me everynight so i'm like ok and i tried going outta my way to see him almost every night and talked to him everynight... then on our second month he goes oh i think ur way too serious about the relationship let's slow it down and i'm like ok so we stopped seeing eachother everyday and talking everynight then two days before christmas we got into a heavy talk and he was like we should just be friends and i'm like omg cause to me now i feel used cause i gave this guy everything even my v card and then a month later he wants to be friends so i was like ok fine and i broke up with him and he was all i still wanna be ur friend and i told him that i couldn't at the moment cause i still had deep feelings for him and we didnt' talk for a couple of days so then the day before new years i called him and i was like i value ur friendship and i don't regret anything between us so i want to be friends and he was like no i can't be ur friend cause ur not over me yet and i was like yea i'm not but it'll fade over time and he was like well u should just get over me cause i already got over u... and i'm think the nerve of him and he was like he knows why i can't get over him it's cause he's a good guy and those are hard to come by and he was being all cocky and i told him he needs to look at himself before being all cocky with me cause i built him up and i'll break him down and he got so mad and wouldn't talk to me....ok so we've been broken up for almost a month now and on friday night the guys asked me to dinner since it's our last dinner together before school starts and anh is there cause we hang out with the same group of ppl and we all at one point worked together so we're all pretty close... and justmy luck he ends up sitting right next to me...and ge and nong decided they were gonna go pee leaving me and anh and he looks at me and was like so i hear you've been talking to alot of guys since our breakup and i told him it's none of his business and he was like what u can't look at me when u talk to me and i was like no then he grabs my hand and says ur hands are always so cold it's like the touch of death and i said to him at least i'm not a cold hearted bastard and he just drop my hand and ge and nong came back and we're all just eating and joking around and my phone rings and anh looks at me so i left the table and he follow me outside and he was like what u can't talk to ur new bf infront of us and i told him leave me alone and he was like i thought u still had feelings for me but i guess that's a lie and i just looked at him wanting to cry and he just grabbed me and hug me and he kissed my head and i pushed him away and we just stop talking.... now i'm confused what the hell does he want from me?.... i know it's a long read sorry.
 
WOW! U noe... I personally think tat he wants U all to himself... like wen he noes tat he has you wrapped around his finger, he likes to show off tat u will alwaise be there and be infacuated and tat he has no worries of losing u. And wen he feels that he is losing and ur attention is on some1 else he doesnt want to lose that so he makes u feel like you are his whole world and that he cant be without u.
I have been there... Its no use... Move on... if he acts like tat, so not worth it... There are plenty of fishes out in the sea. That one is a toss and let it die in the sand... haha... Sorrie i dont intend to be mean...
 

Thookatha

sarNie Elites
ok, here's what i see from reading your passage. he wants you to be his "just in case" girl. as in, he's keeping himself open and at the same time, he wants to keep you open..."just in case" he needs you...for whatever reason.

he's obviously indecisive, insecure and immature. i say cut him loose and don't even care about "what he wants" anymore. being a "good" guy does not tell you that he's gonna be a good companion or a good lover....that involves a whole 'nother person.

and despite the fact that you guys have been friends for over a year and half, you don't really know him. i think you let your admiration take over your mental judgement.

step back and really make a decision. you have deep feelings for someone who does not see your value. are you willing to sacrifice your integrity for this person? your "good" guy just doesn't seem to have any good qualities about him.
 

KhoOnxNouxWanxJai

Staff member
Ok, honestly you know I love you P' Malee :p but I have to say up straight. I think you should cut him loose until you find his real intentions. You definitely don't want to be the, "Just In Case" girl or the "Back Up Chick." Not to mention Booty Call. I use to talk to this guy who sounds similar. The situation was similar, but the thing is that whenever things ended and we decided to cut ties .. I thought things were ok between the two of us, but then all of the sudden people were telling me that he was saying stuff about me and such. The next thing you know I appeared as the bad person while he sounded like the victim. So don't put yourself in the situation. Guys can be just as manipulative as girls. I think you should play the hard to get card to see his real intentions. After awhile he will start to show his true colors. Your a wonderful woman dude and so many great guys will be jocking you don't waste your time with someone who took you for granted.
 

7270

7270
it doesn't matter what he wants from you. from the post, you sound unhappy. it'll be good for you to take a LONG break from him. let him go for now for a very long time, and then maybe you guys can be friends again later.

it's uncomfortable at first, but you have to do it. with time, you'll forget all about him. i was actually addicted to a girl once, and she was all bad for me. very needy and very dramatic. if we were ok, she'd find something to fight about. when i ignored her, she'd get all puppy dog. finally, i just cut her lose. very uncomfy at first, b/c she is a great & cute girl if she wasn't so in need of drama all the time, but she's just "eh" to me now.

you'll be fine. let him go. there are lots of guys in the world. you have to let this one go in order for a better one to take his place. ;)
 
thanks everyone for the advices... i do get unhappy everytime i see him cause he does make me feel like as if i did him wrong...but i'm over that now cause in my eyes and all his close friends views i was a good gf and with school starting and all i just kinda kept myself busy and away from him....i'm being cocky but i don't think he'll find a girl as good as me...lol...thanks again everyone for all the advices... mucho mahalz.
 

aznteadybear

sarNie Egg
From a guy's point of view I think he is just messing with your head. Some guys are like that they like to manipulate girls into falling for them and wrapped around their finger so that they can go back to them when they have no one else. Unfortunately good girls like you are the best target because you don't see the bad in people. You sound like your doing good without him so keep it that way don't be like those girls in high school who gets played over and over by the same guy when they know the relationship is going no where. I use to tell Tina this all the time when she was talking to this jackass that being a bitch is the only way to shake them off you. She was nice to her ex but his ass was telling people that she was stalking him and and all this other bullshit. His friend even tried to tell me that she was cheating on him with me but the way I consider it they were never a couple. So you have to be a bitch to lose a bitch. Sorry for the strong language. Your not being cocky at all because everyone woman needs to love themselves before they try to love someone else. Like my fat girl over here she tells me every day that no one will ever love me the way she does and it's true no one will love my ass the way she loves me thats the attitude we want from girls confidence in yourself. Hahha I normally just read but today I had to post after browsing around while the fat girl is watching Butterfly Lovers
 
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