Stuck in a relationship that is getting...no where.

[thatsouthernasianchick]

What would you do if your girlfriend/ boyfriend told you: "Don't try to read or understand me?" because he/ she doesn't want you to worry about a certain something? You love that person but if you don't try to read and understand them then the relationship gets nowhere, right? You can tell your significant other not to worry but you can't stop his/ her feelings. What is your response? Opinion(s)?

 

[beachboy777]

In my opinion..  as a Straight dude. 
This relationship really suck! You have to be able to read and understand a person that you're with. If not, there will be questions stuck in your head as - what? why ? can't be? confused? doesn't feel right?, mixed emotional? love or not? is this true love? and if this really true love you wouldn't doubt yourself with all those questions. You should have peace of mind being with the one you so call "LOVE"

Stop being so wussy and just do what is best for you. Vice versa..

This relationship not going anywhere.. your wasting each other time. 

:dance2:  :dance3:  
 

 

[thatsouthernasianchick]

Omg...stop saying, "from a straight dude" and stuff like that. I think we all get the point that you're straight, not gay or bi.
Two, don't judge my relationship. I am solely asking for opinions not judgments.
Three, don't call me wussy because all relationships take time to develop. That's why I want to gather additional outside opinions.
The reason why I say this relationship is getting nowhere is because there is a lack of understanding, not because I'm a turtle that is moving slowly on the ditching part. That's why I'm asking for open opinions. The question that I'm asking is that: "What would you do if your relationship isn't progressing?" not "ditch the guy now because I am questioning myself".
I'm pretty sure there are a lot of other people who at first, question themselves and ask for others' opinions and end up happily with their significant other after making a good decision after hearing many opinions.
Anyways, thank you for taking the time to submitting a comment.

 

[beachboy777]

Thanks for lecturing.. Sorry girl

 

[AikOm^_^]

Aw, no...you and your honey bear having your first disagreement? :teary: I've never been in a relationship before, but to him, it's probably nothing big and that's why he doesn't want you asking or trying to understand him too much. :scratchchin: But on the other hand, it's important to you to try to understand him. Hmm, I would say that it's normal for us girls to be sensitive when it comes to that type of situation. Naturally, most of us ask questions to try to understand them better. I would say that communication is the key. Try to explain to him the importance of your questions, why they're necessary to understanding and knowing him even better. You care deeply for him, and that's why you ask him those questions.
 
Gah, I feel like I'm repeating myself. Aw, sorry, if I'm not much of a help. :spin: :cry: Hang in there! :console: :grouphug: :strong:

 

[thatsouthernasianchick]

Aw, no...you and your honey bear having your first disagreement? :teary: I've never been in a relationship before, but to him, it's probably nothing big and that's why he doesn't want you asking or trying to understand him too much. :scratchchin: But on the other hand, it's important to you to try to understand him. Hmm, I would say that it's normal for us girls to be sensitive when it comes to that type of situation. Naturally, most of us ask questions to try to understand them better. I would say that communication is the key. Try to explain to him the importance of your questions, why they're necessary to understanding and knowing him even better. You care deeply for him, and that's why you ask him those questions.
 
Gah, I feel like I'm repeating myself. Aw, sorry, if I'm not much of a help. :spin: :cry: Hang in there! :console: :grouphug: :strong:

His best friend's wife, the co-owner of their businesses, had been texting me lately that he has changed. Said he had been stressed out due to business and told me that don't try to understand him but give him time because as time goes on, I will understand him bit by bit. She said that he didn't want me to worry about anything. Said that he loves me very much that's why he was being an A-hole and saying stuff like that. She also said that she is worried about him too.

 

[thatsouthernasianchick]

Thanks for lecturing.. Sorry girl

I meant no harm.

 

[AikOm^_^]

His best friend's wife, the co-owner of their businesses, had been texting me lately that he has changed. Said he had been stressed out due to business and told me that don't try to understand him but give him time because as time goes on, I will understand him bit by bit. She said that he didn't want me to worry about anything. Said that he loves me very much that's why he was being an A-hole and saying stuff like that. She also said that she is worried about him too.

 
Sounds like he really doesn't want you to worry over him because he loves you, but he has to understand that you want to worry with him and share the burden with him, because you love him that much, too. Aw, but his best friend's wife has your back! :grouphug: It takes two to compromise; if he still doesn't think it's important enough to confide in you/share his thoughts with you, let him know it's not you pushing him away. You're respecting him by giving him the space or privacy he wants. But you'll always be there for him if he ever needs or wants you. Stress to him the importance of you trying to understand him. :console: :cry:

 

[x0unerthanlater]

A man, (that actually worries about you) WILL mean it when they say don't worry because they don't want to burden you. It's in their mentality to be protector, therefore, they feel like they can do everything themselves. It's not that they are unfeeling, or trying to distance themselves. If you worry about them, then you become unhappy, which in turn makes them unhappy. That's why they tell you not to worry etc.
 
- From personal experiences.

 

[m9saeteurn1]

I think that's bull! I for one sure wouldn't want to be in a relationship where your significant can't even open up to you. You should be the "1" person he can turn to no matter what the situation is. A relationship is base on trust and communications. Of course if you love that person you want to understand and know every flaws. I would want my lover to do the same with me. Follow your heart and instinct.
 
Hahahah See Luc I told ya! You use the "From a Str8 guy" in everything you say... Are you sure you're not one of us?? LMAO just kidding

 

[thatsouthernasianchick]

Problems are resolved. So this is the kind of relationship you must expect when dating a business owner.

 

[m9saeteurn1]

Good to hear! Hope everything work out!

 

[AikOm^_^]

Problems are resolved. So this is the kind of relationship you must expect when dating a business owner.

 
That's great. :cry: :grouphug: Be strong now! Hang in there. :strong: :console:

 

[x0unerthanlater]

Problems are resolved. So this is the kind of relationship you must expect when dating a business owner.

 
That's good!
Sometimes you gotta let a man be a man.
But don't let that make you think that you can't worry or nothing.
I always tell my bf that, "the day I stop worrying is the day I stop caring. It's better I worry than feel nothing towards you." 
He understands, but still tells me, "not to worry" still.
 
When he's ready, he'll tell you his problems himself.
It doesn't hurt to ask, that's what 2 people in a relationship is supposed to do.