ok since no one really reply back to this thread. so then i will....
BUT...this story is not mine. it's my older sister. i just thought maybe i'll share to get this thread going.
Like a Fragile Flower
I’m like a fragile flower in a vase without the life of the water. As each day passes by my petals slowly starts to rot away the beautiful colors I once had, yet I waited. Waiting and hoping that someday you’ll realize and you’ll shower me with the life of your water. Yet as each day passes, I grew more and more weary. I no longer stood tall and straight like I use to back in those days where I waited for you. The colorful petals that once held the beauty of me have now fallen down on to the wooden floor of your house, yet you just sweep them up and throw them away. I have lost hope. I have lost hope in trying to make you notice me. I’m tired…tired of waiting…tired of lying to myself that you’ll notice me….
its ok..but i think that it kinda resembles full house a bit...but thats my opinion there are some grammatical and spelling errors...and dialogue?
I’m like a fragile flower in a vase without the life of the water. As each day passes by my petals slowly starts to rot away the beautiful colors I once had, yet I waited. Waiting and hoping that someday you’ll realize and you’ll shower me with the life of your water. Yet as each day passes, I grew more and more weary. I no longer stood tall and straight like I use to back in those days where I waited for you. The colorful petals that once held the beauty of me have now fallen down on to the wooden floor of your house, yet you just sweep them up and throw them away. I have lost hope. I have lost hope in trying to make you notice me. I’m tired…tired of waiting…tired of lying to myself that you’ll notice me….
(i like this paragraph...i think i want to write a poem based on it...very good metaphors that are used....)
this is what i wrote so far....i dont kno what yall think about it but yea....
i dont have names for my characters yet
Ding! Ding! Ding! The bell had rung and everyone rushed to get into class before the professor. Anyone who was tardy was sent out of class and lost a letter grade, with no way of bringing it up. The private college was strict; it required an expensive amount of money to be accepted, along with high-test scores. It was a one-gender college, but both males and females attended it. The girls were segregated from the boys, having their own dorms far from the guys and went had only female classmates. The school was twice the size of a mansion; from the mid floor and up was the girls, and on the bottom floors resided the boys.
As class had begun, p’ek went into his last class, Advanced Statistics. There, he met up with p’ek friend and sat down at their usual table in the front. P’ek was an intelligent boy who focused on majoring in business. He came from a poor family, so his determination to succeed in life was to his extent. It took all of his family’s savings to get him enrolled into this high school, so he couldn’t risk coming home to his proud family and say that he failed them. p’ek friend is the only son to the college principal, so he was spoiled throughout life and school. Everything that he wanted went his way. Although people thought him to be arrogant and a brat, he was nothing like that with his best friend p’ek. They’ve known each other since grade school when the school bully picked on p’ek; it was only p’ek friend who stood up to him and defended p’ek on his behalf. It was since then that p’ek has been loyal to him and became best friends throughout their life. Ding! Ding! Ding! Class had ended, so p’ek friend and p’ek left to their dorms.
“Hey p’ek, you wanna get something to eat?” p’ek friend asks.
“Yea let’s go, I’m starving,” p’ek replies.
“I saw like this new restaurant down the street, and this girl that works there is kinda cute. I think we should check it out,” explains p’ek friend.
“Yea, okay then,” says p’ek.
Driving a couple of miles west down the city, p’ek friend stopped at the restaurant called, Sweet Sun. It was the last building on the road, and behind it resided a clear lake. Ding! Dong! The sound of the entrance rang, when they entered.
“Hi, how many people?” the hostess asked.
“Only two,” p’ek friend replied.
“This way please.”
The waitress led them to a table near the window. The view was magnificent; the azure lake’s ripples were glistening as though the stars had already come out. As the sun was set, the colors of reddish orange covered the sky and clouds. It was as though a painter had over painted the light blue sky with a much more relaxing piece of art.
“Here are your menus. What would you like to order?” The hostess asked.
“Do you guys have daily specials?” asked p’ek.
“Yes we do. Today’s special is…”
“I’ll take that.”
“Me too,” says p’ek friend.
“Alright then. I’ll come back with your meals right away.”
“This place is awesome. The view from here is really great, now wonder its called Sweet Sun.” compliments p’ek.
“Yeah, it’s okay, but look. You see that girl over there? The one with her hair tied by the bottom,” p’ek friend points out.
“Yeah, so what?”
“That’s the one I’m talking bout. Duh!”
“Her? It looks as though I’ve seen her before.”
“You couldn’t have. She’s new to our city.”
“And how do you know that? You don’t even know her name and you’re stalking her already?” p’ek chuckles.
“Hey! I heard it from the other girls at our school.”
“Okay. Whatever.”
“Wait. Here she comes. Look natural!”
“Hi, here is your meal,” the waitress said.
“Are you new around here? I haven’t seen you before,” p’ek friend asks.
“Yeah. Actually I am. I moved here from…”
“Can I ask you your name?” p’ek friend interrupts.
“My name’s n’ek.”
“n’ek?” p’ek replies.
“Yeah.”
