PeNgUIn*3o3
sarNie Egg
Hey everyone!
I am upset I just don't know what to do. I have been dating my friend of 5 years only a few months ago because we sorta realize we "click" Anyways, he's going to Laos in a couple months and I have insecurities up the wah-zoo... meaning... A year ago his dad tried to make him talk to a girl from Laos and now the dad wants him to marry her. He only talks to her when the dad forces him to, other then that he has no interest in marrying one or even dating one. The only reason why he is going to Laos is to meet the girl and marry her. What am I suppose to do? Leave and pretend we have nothing or pray that he would speak up to his dad and say what's really in his heart.
I have come to realize that the dad uses his "stroke" to get his way; his mom disapproves of her only child marrying anyone from Laos because her brother is married to one and she does not love him. The mom does not want her only son to become like that and even told to my aunt that she rather have me marry him. The mom and son hides behind the stroke and does not want the dad to have another stroke problem. Honestly, I think the dad is being selfish.
I just found out that the dad bought plane tickets to Laos without him or his mom knowing it. Three tickets to Laos for Christmas and it was about 2000$ a piece. He told me last night he was mad that he had to go and what will he do with school. He will be missing 3 weeks and each term is 6 weeks long. Knowing that the dad is tricky like this who knows maybe the dad has a plan set up in Laos to marrying the girl, I don't know. I am being mean and hurtful knowing I am talking so badly about an elder here but I am too hurt. The dad knows that we are dating and yet he doesn't care. He is determined to get his son to marry the girl from Laos.
The funny thing is that ladies who are married into this family even told him that they do not see him marrying a girl from Laos because he's got to teach and adapt her to the life here. A son, 28 years old with a Master degree marrying a girl 17 year old from Laos... We can say that everyone from his 2 grandfathers side has said to his parents they do not want him to marry a girl from Laos because being the only son they will depend greatly; if he does marry a girl there he will have more than enough to kill him, and I quote that.
I don't mind him going to Laos and meeting the girl, but I do not want him to come back and tell me that he is married. I would be torn apart and I wouldn't know what to do. I think the dad wants him to marry the 17 year old girl so he can mold her into the ideal daughter-in-law. If his son marries a girl here in US, they have goals and a mindset of their own and I think the dad does not want that. His parents always pushes him and wants him to do everything they think is the best for him but he is tired. He feels that being home is tiring and coming to my place and relaxing with me is like heaven. So I don't nag nor push him. What do I do... I like him dearly and I don't want to tell him or nag him when his parents are doing that already. I just want him to speak his mind but he can't because know he will trigger his dad stress level and he doesnt want that either. When he goes off he will go off... He shares with me all his feeling and in doing this he won't take it out on his parents. I welcome all of his emotions and I help him but I duno what to do now... Help!
I am upset I just don't know what to do. I have been dating my friend of 5 years only a few months ago because we sorta realize we "click" Anyways, he's going to Laos in a couple months and I have insecurities up the wah-zoo... meaning... A year ago his dad tried to make him talk to a girl from Laos and now the dad wants him to marry her. He only talks to her when the dad forces him to, other then that he has no interest in marrying one or even dating one. The only reason why he is going to Laos is to meet the girl and marry her. What am I suppose to do? Leave and pretend we have nothing or pray that he would speak up to his dad and say what's really in his heart.
I have come to realize that the dad uses his "stroke" to get his way; his mom disapproves of her only child marrying anyone from Laos because her brother is married to one and she does not love him. The mom does not want her only son to become like that and even told to my aunt that she rather have me marry him. The mom and son hides behind the stroke and does not want the dad to have another stroke problem. Honestly, I think the dad is being selfish.
I just found out that the dad bought plane tickets to Laos without him or his mom knowing it. Three tickets to Laos for Christmas and it was about 2000$ a piece. He told me last night he was mad that he had to go and what will he do with school. He will be missing 3 weeks and each term is 6 weeks long. Knowing that the dad is tricky like this who knows maybe the dad has a plan set up in Laos to marrying the girl, I don't know. I am being mean and hurtful knowing I am talking so badly about an elder here but I am too hurt. The dad knows that we are dating and yet he doesn't care. He is determined to get his son to marry the girl from Laos.
The funny thing is that ladies who are married into this family even told him that they do not see him marrying a girl from Laos because he's got to teach and adapt her to the life here. A son, 28 years old with a Master degree marrying a girl 17 year old from Laos... We can say that everyone from his 2 grandfathers side has said to his parents they do not want him to marry a girl from Laos because being the only son they will depend greatly; if he does marry a girl there he will have more than enough to kill him, and I quote that.
I don't mind him going to Laos and meeting the girl, but I do not want him to come back and tell me that he is married. I would be torn apart and I wouldn't know what to do. I think the dad wants him to marry the 17 year old girl so he can mold her into the ideal daughter-in-law. If his son marries a girl here in US, they have goals and a mindset of their own and I think the dad does not want that. His parents always pushes him and wants him to do everything they think is the best for him but he is tired. He feels that being home is tiring and coming to my place and relaxing with me is like heaven. So I don't nag nor push him. What do I do... I like him dearly and I don't want to tell him or nag him when his parents are doing that already. I just want him to speak his mind but he can't because know he will trigger his dad stress level and he doesnt want that either. When he goes off he will go off... He shares with me all his feeling and in doing this he won't take it out on his parents. I welcome all of his emotions and I help him but I duno what to do now... Help!