An angry Hmong man shot and killed his estranged wife. He also shot her lover and turned the gun on himself. The estranged husband died at the hospital....the boyfriend was listed as critical condition...
The dead couple have left behind 7 (seven) children ranging from age 5-14 ! How sad!
http://www.wausaudailyherald.com/apps/pbcs.../609150523/1981
Note: Join the Story Chat below
Wausau-area Hmong leaders say Wednesday's shooting in Weston might have been prevented if the victims had followed cultural protocol.
Chor Xiong, 39, shot and killed his estranged wife, Padalina Thao, 29, and shot her boyfriend, Pao Chang, 41, before shooting and killing himself in front of five of the couple's seven children outside their Weston home.
Chang remained in critical condition Thursday at Saint Joseph's Hospital in Marshfield.
Both Xiong and Thao had met with a Hmong mediator in an attempt to work out their differences. Xiong told family members and friends that he thought Thao was cheating on him with Chang. Thao said she couldn't get along with her husband anymore, and at one point told Everest Metro police that Xiong had sexually assaulted her, although she never filed charges.
According to tradition, Hmong people take their disputes to their respective clan leaders when differences can't be worked out. A clan leader -- someone who acts as the spokesman and leader for the entire extended family -- will try to resolve those differences at least three times.
If that doesn't work, the dispute is taken to all the area's respective clan leaders, a group here called the Hmong 18 Clans Council of Marathon County. On Thursday, 11 leaders representing eight clans met with the Wausau Daily Herald to express sorrow for the victims' families while urging other Hmong residents to stick with traditional ways of solving problems.
With infidelity, Hmong clan leaders will financially penalize the person who is cheating on his or her spouse. For example, a clan leader may decide that a man who is having an affair with a married woman must marry that woman and pay half of the cost of the woman's previous wedding.
It never got that far with Xiong and Thao.
"We greatly regret that we never had a chance to work this out before it got out of hand," said Jay Lee, 48, of Weston, who is vice president of the council.
Clan leaders said the system has worked well over the years.
Wednesday's homicide was the first domestic abuse slaying in Marathon County in 10 years involving a Hmong couple. In 1996, Da Vang killed his estranged 24-year-old wife, Jia Yang, and 25-year-old school teacher Voua Lo Kiatoukaysi by shooting each in the head during an argument in Yang's Wausau apartment.
But clan leaders fear young Hmong couples are exacerbating their marital problems by first taking their disputes to the police.
Once the police are involved, the Hmong leaders say, there is little they can do to help.
"(Hmong) kids today are always using the word 'freedom,'" said KhouaPao Lee, 55, of Wausau, former director of the Wausau Area Hmong Mutual Association. "But freedom has nothing to do with cheating on your spouse."
Jane Graham Jennings, executive director of The Women's Community, which provides counseling and temporary housing for people in domestic abuse situations, said most of the Hmong clients who come to the Wausau shelter are women and do so only as a last resort.
"If they're coming to us, that means they've already gone to the clan leaders and the behavior still has not stopped," Graham Jennings said. "It's pretty taboo for Southeast Asians to seek outside help, because it's still a very tradition-based culture."
Although Hmong clan leaders say men and women are treated equally, Graham Jennings said there still is an undercurrent of inequality for Hmong women.
"There's a cultural mindset that ... if women do not do these things, or if they wouldn't act a certain way, then they wouldn't get hurt," she said. "We're trying to change that (mindset)."
Clan leaders said Xiong probably felt like his back was against the wall because his wife already had gone to the police with a sexual assault complaint. Wa Meng Moua, 58, of Wausau said Xiong likely was afraid of being arrested again if he confronted his wife or her boyfriend, so he shot them instead.
Clan leaders, however, said they did not condone Xiong's actions.
"What (Xiong) did was not right, either," Lor said. "It was still domestic abuse. They should have come to us to resolve this issue."
The dead couple have left behind 7 (seven) children ranging from age 5-14 ! How sad!
http://www.wausaudailyherald.com/apps/pbcs.../609150523/1981
Note: Join the Story Chat below
Wausau-area Hmong leaders say Wednesday's shooting in Weston might have been prevented if the victims had followed cultural protocol.
Chor Xiong, 39, shot and killed his estranged wife, Padalina Thao, 29, and shot her boyfriend, Pao Chang, 41, before shooting and killing himself in front of five of the couple's seven children outside their Weston home.
Chang remained in critical condition Thursday at Saint Joseph's Hospital in Marshfield.
Both Xiong and Thao had met with a Hmong mediator in an attempt to work out their differences. Xiong told family members and friends that he thought Thao was cheating on him with Chang. Thao said she couldn't get along with her husband anymore, and at one point told Everest Metro police that Xiong had sexually assaulted her, although she never filed charges.
According to tradition, Hmong people take their disputes to their respective clan leaders when differences can't be worked out. A clan leader -- someone who acts as the spokesman and leader for the entire extended family -- will try to resolve those differences at least three times.
If that doesn't work, the dispute is taken to all the area's respective clan leaders, a group here called the Hmong 18 Clans Council of Marathon County. On Thursday, 11 leaders representing eight clans met with the Wausau Daily Herald to express sorrow for the victims' families while urging other Hmong residents to stick with traditional ways of solving problems.
With infidelity, Hmong clan leaders will financially penalize the person who is cheating on his or her spouse. For example, a clan leader may decide that a man who is having an affair with a married woman must marry that woman and pay half of the cost of the woman's previous wedding.
It never got that far with Xiong and Thao.
"We greatly regret that we never had a chance to work this out before it got out of hand," said Jay Lee, 48, of Weston, who is vice president of the council.
Clan leaders said the system has worked well over the years.
Wednesday's homicide was the first domestic abuse slaying in Marathon County in 10 years involving a Hmong couple. In 1996, Da Vang killed his estranged 24-year-old wife, Jia Yang, and 25-year-old school teacher Voua Lo Kiatoukaysi by shooting each in the head during an argument in Yang's Wausau apartment.
But clan leaders fear young Hmong couples are exacerbating their marital problems by first taking their disputes to the police.
Once the police are involved, the Hmong leaders say, there is little they can do to help.
"(Hmong) kids today are always using the word 'freedom,'" said KhouaPao Lee, 55, of Wausau, former director of the Wausau Area Hmong Mutual Association. "But freedom has nothing to do with cheating on your spouse."
Jane Graham Jennings, executive director of The Women's Community, which provides counseling and temporary housing for people in domestic abuse situations, said most of the Hmong clients who come to the Wausau shelter are women and do so only as a last resort.
"If they're coming to us, that means they've already gone to the clan leaders and the behavior still has not stopped," Graham Jennings said. "It's pretty taboo for Southeast Asians to seek outside help, because it's still a very tradition-based culture."
Although Hmong clan leaders say men and women are treated equally, Graham Jennings said there still is an undercurrent of inequality for Hmong women.
"There's a cultural mindset that ... if women do not do these things, or if they wouldn't act a certain way, then they wouldn't get hurt," she said. "We're trying to change that (mindset)."
Clan leaders said Xiong probably felt like his back was against the wall because his wife already had gone to the police with a sexual assault complaint. Wa Meng Moua, 58, of Wausau said Xiong likely was afraid of being arrested again if he confronted his wife or her boyfriend, so he shot them instead.
Clan leaders, however, said they did not condone Xiong's actions.
"What (Xiong) did was not right, either," Lor said. "It was still domestic abuse. They should have come to us to resolve this issue."