I like to stock up my food, seasonings (fish sauce, sugar etc.), laundry detergents. Every time is low I go buy it sometimes when I'm come home frm work wanting to cook something ran out. I don't want to stop at the store just to get 1 thing or so cause I'm tired and don't want to drive. I don't mind if they eat/use it. I'm not greedy. Like I made eggrolls and I stock 5 bags of eggrolls each has like 10. I ate 1 bag and I gave mom 1 bag so there supposed to be 3 bags left. But I see none. I don't mind eating it. I like it if they eat it even though they don't need to ask me. It means I make good food. But should at least save me like 1 bag or maybe 5 pieces. Becuz they should have a feeling of greng jai (don't bothersome something like that) I know I am a person who is greng jai I wouldn't really touch someone's else food or things. There's no need to cuz I like to go buy food. Like the washer it was broken before we moved in so my bf find a new washer that's on sale $200. Suppose to split in 2 so $100 each but they say they have no money. My bf bought himself havent got the money yet but they end up using a lot than us. My bf doesn't want to buy laundry deter becuz he harldy use wash his clothes no point becuz it'll be low or gone. but I wash it @ least every week like if the detergents has like 35 loads I probably use like 6-7 times then it'll be gone. My bf tells me to hide it leave it in the room but I feel funny becuz you're living together and to hide things that are meant to share laundry is outside not meant to keep it inside. U know what I mean? plus I don't to let peeps to think that I'm hiding things and don't want to share cuz I'm not? What would u do?
roommates???
- Thread starter little
- Start date
noungning
Heartless
um well when i was dorming, my roommate and i were best friends and we didn't really fight or anything and the stuff were basically u bought it, u use it, i bought it, i use it... we didn't really share. and we had no problems of that either. there will be sometimes where she didn't have something and asked to borrow. but she asked, and never really took the rights of doing things on her own without asking.
however, when i was in thailand, i lived with some people in this townhouse and they had the community washer downstairs too, i'd buy like 20+ hangers to hang my clothes, buy a new detergent bag every single time i wash my clothes... it was getting annoying, the hangers were gone, and i ended up buying like almost 100 hangers and i was just temporarily living there! so what i did with the hangers was i brought it with me... lol like when i was done washing my clothes... it dried, i'd take my hanger and put it in my basket instead of just hanging it there so ppl takes it. the detergent just had to be there because in thailand, it comes in bags and if i were to bring it with me, it'd be a big mess... so i ended up spending loads of money on detergent for my 'house mates' who were just looking to use free detergent...
also in thailand, there's this rule of the house, if u leave it in the fridge it's the community-meaning everyone in the house can eat it so don't bitch if it's gone lol... and it's acceptable. what they say is, if u don't want anyone to have it then take it with u.
so ur situation, if it's come to the point where u don't want to share then take it with u because they are taking u foregranted, it sucks to be in the position... it's like i'm not cheap but i also wanna use the stuff i bought, or eat the stuff i made...
however, when i was in thailand, i lived with some people in this townhouse and they had the community washer downstairs too, i'd buy like 20+ hangers to hang my clothes, buy a new detergent bag every single time i wash my clothes... it was getting annoying, the hangers were gone, and i ended up buying like almost 100 hangers and i was just temporarily living there! so what i did with the hangers was i brought it with me... lol like when i was done washing my clothes... it dried, i'd take my hanger and put it in my basket instead of just hanging it there so ppl takes it. the detergent just had to be there because in thailand, it comes in bags and if i were to bring it with me, it'd be a big mess... so i ended up spending loads of money on detergent for my 'house mates' who were just looking to use free detergent...
also in thailand, there's this rule of the house, if u leave it in the fridge it's the community-meaning everyone in the house can eat it so don't bitch if it's gone lol... and it's acceptable. what they say is, if u don't want anyone to have it then take it with u.
so ur situation, if it's come to the point where u don't want to share then take it with u because they are taking u foregranted, it sucks to be in the position... it's like i'm not cheap but i also wanna use the stuff i bought, or eat the stuff i made...
Okay, sorry, I had more to say but had to get to class.
Anyway, it sounds like you're forking over all the money and your roommates aren't doing their part to pitch in.
I don't know what your situation is or where you live but if you live in the states and sharing an apartment or dorm, what's yours is yours and what's theirs is theirs. If you wanna share fine but don't complain when they eat all your food and use up all your resources.
Unless they're actually your friends label your stuff or talk to your roommates about it, if you don't they'll assume you're fine with it and continue to do what they do.
The point of living with other people is to make things cheaper for everyone, which means splitting the costs and bills, not leech off of other people.
Anyway, it sounds like you're forking over all the money and your roommates aren't doing their part to pitch in.
I don't know what your situation is or where you live but if you live in the states and sharing an apartment or dorm, what's yours is yours and what's theirs is theirs. If you wanna share fine but don't complain when they eat all your food and use up all your resources.
Unless they're actually your friends label your stuff or talk to your roommates about it, if you don't they'll assume you're fine with it and continue to do what they do.
The point of living with other people is to make things cheaper for everyone, which means splitting the costs and bills, not leech off of other people.
NiteStarrz
sarNie Egg
i'm sry to hear about ur situation * tear * ok so this might come off a bit harsh but i mean well so don't take it personally ;p ummmm....there's a difference b/w being nice n being a push over n i'm sry to tell u but u're being a push over!!!! u shouldn't let ppl take advantage of u or ur bf i don't know how old u r but if u're living away from home then that indicates to me that u're old enough to be on ur own n therefore u should be old enough to stand up for urself n the one u love (ur bf) they r ur roommates/housemates like some1 pointed out earlier they are not ur family therefore it's not ur job to provide for them - be it food, laundry stuff, etc. u r a nice person but nice ppl tend to get taken advantage of unless they put their foot down u need to let these ppl know what's ok n what's not - ie: u can have 1 bag of eggrolls the rest is mine as for the laundry machine this depends if it's ur house n u're renting out rooms to these ppl then i feel that they shouldn't have to pitch in for the machine b/c it's ur house n the machine will most likely stay with u when they are long gone however if u are all renting out a place then yes they should pitch in if they don't have the $ then rent out the machine to them - i'm sure u all split utilities so therefore tell them that unless they pay u the $ in full up front u will be increasing their portion of the water and electrical bill while lowering urs until the full 100 paid - ie: they can pay 20 more per month for 5 months - also re the food u could start labeling ur stuff n let them know that they can no longer use ur stuff w/o ur permission
i dunno i've lived with a variety of ppl both friends and random ppl that i found through a roommate search n i've never had a problem i don't consider myself a mean or selfish or cheap or greedy person i'm fair but firm therefore i don't think that by labeling for stuff or calling ppl out on their rudeness to be mean
as someone pointed out earlier we don't know where u live so there might be some cultural concerns that u have to take into account when it comes to communal living - ie the whole food in the fridge if ur in bkk thingee
NEwho i hope this helps - stay strong n remember i know i might have come off i bit harsh n i'm sry if i offended but u asked so i answered ;p nice ppl get taken advantage off but like i said there's a different b/w being nice n being a push over therefore u can be nice w/o being a push over ;p
that's my 2 cents - ok more like a whole dollar i know the post was kinda loooooong hehe - g'luck!!!
i dunno i've lived with a variety of ppl both friends and random ppl that i found through a roommate search n i've never had a problem i don't consider myself a mean or selfish or cheap or greedy person i'm fair but firm therefore i don't think that by labeling for stuff or calling ppl out on their rudeness to be mean
as someone pointed out earlier we don't know where u live so there might be some cultural concerns that u have to take into account when it comes to communal living - ie the whole food in the fridge if ur in bkk thingee
NEwho i hope this helps - stay strong n remember i know i might have come off i bit harsh n i'm sry if i offended but u asked so i answered ;p nice ppl get taken advantage off but like i said there's a different b/w being nice n being a push over therefore u can be nice w/o being a push over ;p
that's my 2 cents - ok more like a whole dollar i know the post was kinda loooooong hehe - g'luck!!!
I've had roommates in the pass. All different types. But when you move in with someone, you need to set the ground rule straight and what you like and dislike.
I've had roommates that we split everything right in the middle. And the ones that we share almost everything, but we were considerate of each other... so I got really lucky there.
However, I totally know what you mean. Since you've already live with them for a while... and starting to hide your stuff now would just make think you're greedy. So I suggest, you should talk to your roommate and that you don't want to come out stingy or anything.... but starting from now, whatever you buy it's yours to use and if someone's going to use it... please ask. And also, just tell him what's happening and even though it'll come out as a misunderstanding on their end... hopefully they'll realize and help pitch in... and if not, then yeah, start hiding your stuff and if you have to... remind them that they'll need to ask.
It's tough cause some people don't understand and thinks that we should be sharing... THAT BS... if that's the case... then you just gotta buy just enough for yourself.
Don't let them take advantage of you... you need to advantage of the opportunity.
I've had roommates that we split everything right in the middle. And the ones that we share almost everything, but we were considerate of each other... so I got really lucky there.
However, I totally know what you mean. Since you've already live with them for a while... and starting to hide your stuff now would just make think you're greedy. So I suggest, you should talk to your roommate and that you don't want to come out stingy or anything.... but starting from now, whatever you buy it's yours to use and if someone's going to use it... please ask. And also, just tell him what's happening and even though it'll come out as a misunderstanding on their end... hopefully they'll realize and help pitch in... and if not, then yeah, start hiding your stuff and if you have to... remind them that they'll need to ask.
It's tough cause some people don't understand and thinks that we should be sharing... THAT BS... if that's the case... then you just gotta buy just enough for yourself.
Don't let them take advantage of you... you need to advantage of the opportunity.
iluvnumandoil
sarNie OldFart
friends, relative who ever that might be, will always be good friends until you live with them , that when they get on your nerves
lady_sati
sarNie Adult
awww, i understand your greng jai.
im like that too i think.
i dont touch people's thing. or i dont eat it too.
i understand your situation.
i dont mind my roomys eating my things,
but if they dont buy anything and just wait for me,
it's hard for me to feed everyone.
and we're all grown up, everyone should take care of themself, right?
i think you have to talk to them.
just tell them that you want them to help around the house too.
like, help buy things here and there.
and that it's hard for you to do everything yourself.
i dont mind people eating my things,
but if they dont even save my a little... that makes me think that they are inconsiderate.
which they are inconsiderate if they do that.
tell them.
work something out.
if they dont want to compromise,
then they can use anything that belongs to you.
it's fair.
you're not being mean. you've been considerate,
and they've taken advantage of your niceness.
i hope it works out for you.
good luck.
take care.
im like that too i think.
i dont touch people's thing. or i dont eat it too.
i understand your situation.
i dont mind my roomys eating my things,
but if they dont buy anything and just wait for me,
it's hard for me to feed everyone.
and we're all grown up, everyone should take care of themself, right?
i think you have to talk to them.
just tell them that you want them to help around the house too.
like, help buy things here and there.
and that it's hard for you to do everything yourself.
i dont mind people eating my things,
but if they dont even save my a little... that makes me think that they are inconsiderate.
which they are inconsiderate if they do that.
tell them.
work something out.
if they dont want to compromise,
then they can use anything that belongs to you.
it's fair.
you're not being mean. you've been considerate,
and they've taken advantage of your niceness.
i hope it works out for you.
good luck.
take care.
Thanks for all replying. I know u guys are more tougher than I am. I'm always the type of person who can't say or hard to say no. That is why my friend (I consider close since I once thought I could do/sacrifice my life or stuffs for her) Borrow my cds/money like 5-6 times and never even paid back the old and continue to borrow more. Personally I don't like to lend money/or stuff but to a friend if they in need I'll do it but a borrow is u gotta paid back. If it's a give it's different. I never ask back frm her whenever I see her I just let it go. I don't want to ruin anything or cause drama. Now we don't hang out anymore since she's busy with her own family. I just hate it how she has to lie to me when she call me to borrow money she said she need to pay bills but the day she ask me is the day of the 4th of july she was recently dating just quit her job I guess she just wanted money to celebrate a date I know i feel funny but I lend it anyway. My older sis even tells me to stop doing it but at the time I didn't have the gut to say no until she kept on calling whenever she wants to borrow again then I said no I don't have. She would say it's ok. Our friendship would have last if she didn't lie keeps her words when borrowing/or other cause I felt close to her once. and I really do have good feelings to others. I love food so I like to buy but I'll try to limit and try to hid the things that goes out fast. As for the laundry I'll probably go do it at mom's house. I don't even make a lot of money but I'm generous enough to lend it to a friend but why they don't greng jai (considerate). It's so hard for me to ask to borrow stuff. But I have u guys to express it to. Thanks for all u hardwork on uploading music, lakorns I'm even more happier stalking on this site. SB cant wait to watch. Muchas gracias.
omg little im just like you i can hardly say no to people what i do is before i confront someone i think of something in my mind that makes me angry and i mean really angry not like angry in ur thought but so angry that when u think about it you can't help gettiing up and jumping in frustration. and then confront them tell them they need to ask at least when thye eat ur food or say if they gonna eat it without asking at least be considerate and don't be a pig and eat it all themselves
~Sandy~
Memories with Oil from his U.S. Tour in Nov 2009!
Just seperate the cabinets space, put your ingredients, seasonings, etc in your cabinets and lock it up. Sorry, gotta be mean sometimes. With food in the fridge, you may want to have a small fridge of your own and keep that locked. As for the washer...off limits until they pay you the other $100. Not fair that your BF paid for it and they are also using it. Or just let them know, they need to starting splitting these things 50/50. No one should be used like that.