The RANDOMNESS Thread

maimyang

If only Charlie
I’ve been listening to the song “Break Up in the End” by the country singer Cole Swindell;; the words are so true.. the wrong moves and mistakes we make are experiences nonetheless. We must take the good and bad parts, and perhaps it is all part of the process, part of the plan.:icon12: Never regret making the decisions you made, they made you become who you are and will be forever a part of your beautiful life story.

 

Maricon

sarNie Oldmaid
My first boyfriend (now ex) broke up with me a few days ago. We dated for four months. He said he thought he can balance work,training and me and he got tired. We didn't even fight about anything. Second is about his age. He is 30, I'm 23. He said I don't deserve him and that I'm still young and I'll meet a lot of guys. I felt very devastated as I've lost my boyfriend and best friend in the same person. My family and friends were also devastated on what happened, my friends are real mad. He even unfriended and blocked me on Facebook. My world went dark, upside down, dead when I lost him. I don't even know how to stand up again. I don't even want to go out of the house. I cried the whole day.

I am thankful for all the advices. Since we live in a world where ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE, there is a possibility of him coming back and ask me for another chance. I said to myself that in case that happens, I am willing to give this relationship another try as long as we are secured and that we'll get through everything and end up together forever. But then some people told me that it is not worth it because of what he did and that he shouldn't break up with me in the first place since the issue can still be resolved through proper communication. Supposedly he will introduce me to his family and friends before his birthday, unfortunately it didn't happen because of this. Though I was able to introduce him to my family 3 months ago. Unfortunately he didn't get the opportunity to meet my friends. One of my friends told me that if he was able to introduce me to his family and friends and I get to introduce him to my friends, our friends or even family members might be able to join forces and do everything in power for us to get back together.

Despite the situation, I forgive him. Of course, I love him and I miss him so much. I only wish him all the best in this life. We'll cross paths again, who knows what will happen in the long run. I am thankful he came into my life, I learned a lot from him and I will never hate him, because life is too short for hate. I will always love and accept him for who he is, until my last day on earth.
 

x0unerthanlater

คนไม่รักดี
I just had a very random thought: When you have a crush on someone, even the back of their head is beautiful...
This thought came about when I was watching one of those fancams for the end of an award show/ or like those end of the year concert thing. Where all the idols gather on stage and wave at fans. Well, fans love to keep a close eye on their ships to see if their ships interact on stage.

I was watching a SungJoy fancam of the recent SBS Gayo Daejoon, and it shows them supposedly glancing at each other several times, but never at the same time... It made me think about how all they see is the back of each other's head. So yeah... random.... It reminded me of the days I was crushing on a guy as a teen and how just seeing him from the back made me giddy.:pancarta: Please excuse my nostalgic rambling. Hahaha
 

maimyang

If only Charlie
I just had a very random thought: When you have a crush on someone, even the back of their head is beautiful...
This thought came about when I was watching one of those fancams for the end of an award show/ or like those end of the year concert thing. Where all the idols gather on stage and wave at fans. Well, fans love to keep a close eye on their ships to see if their ships interact on stage.

I was watching a SungJoy fancam of the recent SBS Gayo Daejoon, and it shows them supposedly glancing at each other several times, but never at the same time... It made me think about how all they see is the back of each other's head. So yeah... random.... It reminded me of the days I was crushing on a guy as a teen and how just seeing him from the back made me giddy.:pancarta: Please excuse my nostalgic rambling. Hahaha
Wow, I never thought about that but it is so true!!! I don’t know what it is but maybe something having to do with him or her being faced away too, all vulnerable and everything, which you don’t wish to do harm to that person, and you just love from a distance!!! A bittersweet feeling kind of comes with it and you feel fondness :icon12::confused12:

Me, I just love people observing,, especially my crushes heheee and something about them unaware, innocent, and completely trusting when I’m looking at them from behind, just makes them Beautiful! But yeah, I can and I’m sure others can make out their crush from the back even if far away,, Cuteee.
 

x0unerthanlater

คนไม่รักดี
Wow, I never thought about that but it is so true!!! I don’t know what it is but maybe something having to do with him or her being faced away too, all vulnerable and everything, which you don’t wish to do harm to that person, and you just love from a distance!!! A bittersweet feeling kind of comes with it and you feel fondness :icon12::confused12:

Me, I just love people observing,, especially my crushes heheee and something about them unaware, innocent, and completely trusting when I’m looking at them from behind, just makes them Beautiful! But yeah, I can and I’m sure others can make out their crush from the back even if far away,, Cuteee.
That's the exact feeling, fondness. A crush is to be admired from afar.

Yes, I was always able to pinpoint my crush in a large crowd, even if he had his back turned. Very bittersweet indeed.
 

maimyang

If only Charlie
"Trust in the magic of new beginnings."

I can't wait for 2019!!! I just have a feeling it's going to be a year full of self discovery and growth and maturity for me! I'm going to work hard, believe, and Strive to do the best I can to achieve the dreams and goals I set for this coming year! In 2018, I found great joy and interest in making gifs and also music videos of Thai dramas and of actors and actresses.. which made me research today what are workers who make music videos called? The answer to that is they are called Music Video Directors. They not only come up with a concept for the MV, but also direct the actors and actresses, do the cutting, editing, organizing, and putting of MVs together for the final product! I find great interest in that career and hope to be able to be a Music Video Director or a career related to it one day. I especially enjoy and find so much Fun in the part where I get to line up the edited clips to the lyrics and beat of the song. One day, I'd like to work with my favorite stars, even Thai stars although I don't speak Thai, I'm sure there are many who speak and understand English. One actor and actress I'd like to work with one day are Pope and Mai Davika. :) I'd be the happppppiest person alive. :) Well, yeah I know there are going to be obstacles and I'm going to fail and make mistakes sometimes, but I'll get up and brush myself off and keep walking. I'll do my best to not be discouraged by failures and dead ends. Okies, I'm done with my thoughts for tonight. 2019, bring it ON! :D Hehe funny thing is I'm going to read this post one day and I just hope I'm a bit closer to my dreams..:icon12:
 
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x0unerthanlater

คนไม่รักดี
*** Trigger warning, this might be a bit much for some*** (This is just a rant/expressive writing)

There's just one thing I hate (strong word, I know) about the female psyche... the emotional side. The fact that every now and then, I go through these emotional roller coasters. (All other women as well, ofc) Then I get even more irritated by the fact that I realize I'm irritated. 2018 was a bunch of down falling moments. I feel like I went through a million life trials. In retrospect, they were all doable, tolerable and endurable. But, that's only because I made it to the here and now. It definitely didn't feel great trying to piece myself back together.

A lot of times, I wished I was more apathetic. Growing up I was super empathetic... I would get emotional and feel hurt easily. And it was about seeing things, hearing things and witnessing harshness at such a young age. A time I didn't even understand why I was hurting so much. I even thought If I could have one super power in this world, I'd want to be a healer. Someone who took in other people's pain and misery. But, as my own tribulations become more and more, I hated the idea. I practiced selfishness because I was tired of ppl taking advantage of the good feelings I give them. I became calculative because I didn't want to expect too much...

If it was easy to be rid of some feelings, wouldn't it be easier to just exist?
 

maimyang

If only Charlie
These past months, I’ve been thinking about my parents and seeing them grow older.. with them growing older, there are also growing health issues. My dad has been having stomach pain and muscle tension. My mom now wears hearing aides and has dentures. My dad had a fall about three months ago. My mom is beginning to look frail and hunched over. I love them so much and wish that time could stand still so that I can have a bit more time with them. I think, and can remember and picture clearly when my dad wasn’t so skinny and he was strong and able. I miss those days so much. I’m getting teary eyed writing this.. but I also know health problems are common as we age. We’re like a car that as the years roll by, we too become worn.. I myself am having health issues too as I age. It is becoming clearer and clearer to me that time and health are two things we really do take for granted, until they’re almost or is gone. I would like to spend more time with those who love and want and need me in their lives. I want to be a better person because the time we have is really short. In the blink of an eye, really, there just wasn’t enough time spent with you..
 

x0unerthanlater

คนไม่รักดี
These past months, I’ve been thinking about my parents and seeing them grow older.. with them growing older, there are also growing health issues. My dad has been having stomach pain and muscle tension. My mom now wears hearing aides and has dentures. My dad had a fall about three months ago. My mom is beginning to look frail and hunched over. I love them so much and wish that time could stand still so that I can have a bit more time with them. I think, and can remember and picture clearly when my dad wasn’t so skinny and he was strong and able. I miss those days so much. I’m getting teary eyed writing this.. but I also know health problems are common as we age. We’re like a car that as the years roll by, we too become worn.. I myself am having health issues too as I age. It is becoming clearer and clearer to me that time and health are two things we really do take for granted, until they’re almost or is gone. I would like to spend more time with those who love and want and need me in their lives. I want to be a better person because the time we have is really short. In the blink of an eye, really, there just wasn’t enough time spent with you..

I feel this way well. I have elderly parents whom I care for. Every year as they age and develop ailments, I get more worried. I've slowly tried to be more patient with them. We don't always get along because growing up, they were very strict with me. To the point of being illogical. But now that I've matured, I've learned to accept that their strictness was their only way of showing me they cared... So I've been working on being more patient and understanding with them.

I've started to think that these last few 10 or so years (if I'm lucky), I'll value the time I have with them. I'll be with them as much as I can, and do what I can to the best of my abilities for them. We only get 1 set of parents in our lifetime. These are the only people that will love us unconditionally. We live in a day and time where we can record their smiles, their laughter and their lectures (lol). Don't say you don't have time for them because time can be made. Walk with them, talk to them, just doing the littlest things. You won't regret it and it'll all become precious memories in the future.
 

x0unerthanlater

คนไม่รักดี
I be wanting to write stories (fanfic - short stories) but I get so distracted easily that the plot would go in 100 different directions. Lol In my head my stories seem interesting but as soon as I try to record it, it's all over the place.

p.s. If you're a writer, how do you differentiate between writing about yourself and writing about a character? Like how to pull the character out of your mind without giving it your thoughts? This is something I struggle with. I want to write about things far from my personal life, but I tend to circle back and start putting my experiences into it.
 

byebye

sarNie OldFart
I be wanting to write stories (fanfic - short stories) but I get so distracted easily that the plot would go in 100 different directions. Lol In my head my stories seem interesting but as soon as I try to record it, it's all over the place.

p.s. If you're a writer, how do you differentiate between writing about yourself and writing about a character? Like how to pull the character out of your mind without giving it your thoughts? This is something I struggle with. I want to write about things far from my personal life, but I tend to circle back and start putting my experiences into it.
I am such an introvert that it's easy for me anyway to write my character. Sometimes, I get trapped in wanting to incorporate some of me into the character. I think if you write enough stories, there are times you can see yourself in a certain character, that's normal to me.
 

Maricon

sarNie Oldmaid
It's been 8 months since our relationship ended and last May 2nd was our supposed first anniversary together. Some people think that I am having so much hard time to get over it but first of all I don't care. I became busy at work to the point of burning out and crying after work every single day. Then recently he texted me out of nowhere asking how I was, and that I take care of myself always. I replied to him as well then later on there are no texts again. Nothing is certain except change, death and taxes, so what assurance can we have if he is going to come back or not? People will leave anyway. We will all die anyway. So is it even worth finding someone again if they will leave in the end?

I'd rather go through hell alone than heaven with someone else.
 
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