Should school only focus on abstinence-only?

[Liberty]

It's easy to judge but when you have kids yourself and have to sit down and talk to your daughter or son about the intimate details of sex and sexually transmitted diseases, as well as safe sex, will you be able to do it? Just imagine if they have questions, you're going to have to sit down and answer EVERY question they have. None of this kindergarten answer like "when two people love each other, yaya yaya". After a certain age they're not going to buy it.

Some parents are thankful for schools that teach that.
And about the overworked teachers, it's true that they're overworked but there are usually specific teachers who are there to teach about this, or they have the school nurse do it. Sometimes they bring experts from the local clinics to talk to students. I think that's one of the better ideas because they're more equipped to answer any question thrown at them, just by their training alone.

 

[amikrazie]

For sex ed though they did offer parents the option of excusing their kids for the day that sex ed was taught. The school understood that some parents don't want their kids exposed to it at all and warned them weeks in advance. If they didn't want their kids learning about it they filled out a form that was sent home excusing them for the day.

I liked that it was taught by my biology teacher. She was explaining things like a doctor and not feeding us some BS about 'love, marriage, etc.' Not that love and marriage is BS but we all know that not everyone has sex for love or wait til marriage.
She passed around a box to let us put in questions, we didn't have to put our names on it. She would answer anything that was asked. Then they had us watch this vide of a woman giving birth. Let me tell you...if that didn't scare the crap out of you, I don't know what will. It was not pretty and it DID NOT look like fun. So yeah, um...I plan on adopting. ^_^

i dont remember anything bout the bra..it was that long ago!...lol

i want to adopt too....im getting too old to have kids on my own lol...

i know how uncomfortable i would be if my parents was to sit down and discuss bout sex with me! *ugh i cant even imagine..and i dont think i wanna.. :mellow:

i was more comfortable telling my 7th grade teacher when i first got my period...she hugged me and congratulate me like i won an award..or something and it was in the library too...shhshsshshhs!!! but my mom was the last person to find out...i didnt feel comfortable telling her somehow..but now..if i need anything personal..shes the first person to know.. *she had to confront me bout my pms..lol awkward moment for me..but her words were reassuring me that i can tell her almost anything..well most things..some "other" things are meant to be kept as secrets..

 

[thai-lakorn-fan-forever]

i grew up with pretty straightforward parents and a comfortable environment actually...my parents never actually said "don't have sex until you're married" or anything like that, but they did inform me about the details and STDs and all that and it wasn't all that awkward...they accepted that it wasn't likely, in today's society and in reality, that i would completely wait until marriage or anything...my mother actually said she just wanted me to take care of myself and to be safe and all in all situations, but growing up, she never tried to hinder me from doing it, nor did she encourage it...but i guess that because i was always close to my parents, especially my mother...but yeah, so when things aren't hidden and when parents explain things thoroughly and make it clear that anything can be discussed, well, the child is likely to make better, more informed choices...

 

[Liberty]

i dont remember anything bout the bra..it was that long ago!...lol

i want to adopt too....im getting too old to have kids on my own lol...

i know how uncomfortable i would be if my parents was to sit down and discuss bout sex with me! *ugh i cant even imagine..and i dont think i wanna.. :mellow:

i was more comfortable telling my 7th grade teacher when i first got my period...she hugged me and congratulate me like i won an award..or something and it was in the library too...shhshsshshhs!!! but my mom was the last person to find out...i didnt feel comfortable telling her somehow..but now..if i need anything personal..shes the first person to know.. *she had to confront me bout my pms..lol awkward moment for me..but her words were reassuring me that i can tell her almost anything..well most things..some "other" things are meant to be kept as secrets..

lol My parents and I are the same way.
I'm close with my parents and we can talk about most things but when it comes to sex, urgh...I'd feel more comfortable if we never talk about that. EVER. Just having my dad tell me to wait til marriage gives me the heebie jeebies. Just even hinting of talking about it makes me uncomfortable. I'd rather talk about it with a friend or a professional.

 

[fun]

I remember in high school in health class the teacher said, "if you are in my class and not a virgin then you are probably worthless in a man's view because you are no longer housewife material just dirty and scanty." I was shocked because one of the girls in there wasn't a virgin she lost it when she was 12 because she was raped ... it was totally unfair to her... and that teacher even went as far as saying, "if something like that happened to you; than god is punishing you."

That is just so sad (in a messed up way) that the teacher emphasize a woman is worthless if they’re not a virgin. So the boys/men who screw up with the ladies are worthless. I would have bitch slap that teacher.


Bimbos who supports abstinence-only program must be complete idiots. I do support it but not financially. Money should be spent on something that actually works not in theory. Children, teens, and adults are exposed to sex every day. The problem is society. Whether one with knowledge, when they want sex, contraception is priceless, they must include it into the programs. Though it doesn’t reduced teen sex, it reduces STD and other viruses. The only problem I have is that clinic provides free condoms. It’s almost as if “hey people, come here, and use this to have safe sex.�I don’t encourage people to use the pills but it’s not my problem if they choose to use it or not; it can cause other things in the futures.

 

[amikrazie]

awww thats hecka messed up on what the damn heartless teacher said..aww poor kid...

wouldnt ya wonder if the teacher has a daughter or daughters that sleeps with guys before marriage??? what will that teacher do???...raises hell?!..disown the child? i dont wanna jinx..but dangit have a heart atleast..stuff does happens.. :mellow:

with a mouth like that, that teacher isnt fit to be a teacher!!!..i will biatch slap that teacher with you funfun..

 

[natty]

it's nice to hear that parents can't answer something so basic...

 

[emo]

I just believe natures take its course. It's almost as if learning to be potty train. :yahoo: I shouldn't be joking around with this issue. But in my opinion, I am not scared to say it, I had sex before marriage and I haven't regretted it. It's not like I am a bad person. It feels to me that when I read about these abstinence-only thing, I laugh about it. When it comes to sexual activities, abstinence-only programs are nothing but wasteful of energy. I had two partners, yes only two and I ain't ashame of it. My ex boyfriend we made it clear that we were ready but it didn't work out in the end but we didn't regret what we had. My boyfriend understands me and I am pretty sure I was not his first. About protection, I don't use the pill, I am actually afraid of them.

 

[marduk]

I just believe natures take its course. It's almost as if learning to be potty train. :yahoo: I shouldn't be joking around with this issue. But in my opinion, I am not scared to say it, I had sex before marriage and I haven't regretted it. It's not like I am a bad person. It feels to me that when I read about these abstinence-only thing, I laugh about it. When it comes to sexual activities, abstinence-only programs are nothing but wasteful of energy. I had two partners, yes only two and I ain't ashame of it. My ex boyfriend we made it clear that we were ready but it didn't work out in the end but we didn't regret what we had. My boyfriend understands me and I am pretty sure I was not his first. About protection, I don't use the pill, I am actually afraid of them.

Hey emo, I'm just using your wording as an example, so don't take offense to it.

I find it sad that anyone would have to preclude their writing to say they're not ashamed of having sex before. By even having to do that, it's suggestive that sex is still shameful in nature when it's not. The human race goes on because we have sex yet in society it's so taboo that many get all hush-hush when it comes up. If people actually get married and stay together forever at a good rate, then I can understand all these feelings surrounding the idea that you shouldn't have sex until you get married. However, the reality is that the marriage rate here in the U.S. is barely passing a 50% success rate. So then what's all this sacredness surrounding your virginity until you get married? Are you automatically branded a slut or a playa because you had sex before marriage? Do you need a license (marriage certificate) to have sex? That's just going to make for one awkward wedding night.

I'm Marduk and I approve this message.

 

[amikrazie]

good point made^

 

[lady0fdarkness]

ahh... what a hard topic-- considering the society that we live in. Ultimately, I don't think it's the school's job to teach the kids. I think it's up to the parents and how the kids were raised in that household.

 

[Liberty]

I think it's good the schools teach the kids about sex because you can't always count on the parents to do their job.
Lets face it, there aren't that many "perfect" parents out there, if any at all (despite what you think of your own, no one's perfect).
Look at the governor of Alaska she believes that only abstinence should be taught at school and yeah, her teenager daughter got knocked up. I'm not saying learning about sex would've prevented it but it didn't hurt to have told her the consequences of sex and how to be safe about it.

Sex in it of itself is not a shameful act. In different times as soon as a girl's body was matured (meaning she started her period) she was considered a marriagable age. So you'd have 13 or 14 year old girls getting married, a lot of the time to men who were MUCH older. It seems like a strange concept to us now because a lot of that is illegal in most places, especially the US but those were different times. People back then didn't live for very long so they needed to get all that business out of the way as soon as possible.

Societal norms and faux pas change with the time. In the US and in a many places, people don't get married until they're typically in their 20s, for many, older.
But sex only became shameful when someone equates shame with it. Leave it to religion (which, before modern times dictated the government and how a state/nation was run) to make something as normal as sex be a "sin".
It's like money, it's only a piece of paper or a hunk of rock/mineral until someone equates meaning to it. If someone doesn't put value to a piece of paper or a coin, it wouldn't be anything but what it is -- a piece of a paper and a hunk of mineral.

Why is it that it's okay in most society that men not wait til marriage for sex? But when a woman does the same thing she's "tainted" or her worth has been lessen? As long as we keep thinking this way, this is how things will remain.

I agree viriginity has nothing to do with purity. I've seen some slutty virgins out there. They may be virgin technically but they way the act says otherwise.
I just don't think a woman's worth should be based on the piece of skin in her nether regions (sorry iky I know, lol).

I have nothing against people who choose to wait until marriage for sex, hey if that's what they want then more power to them, but that doesn't mean it's right for everyone. Some marriages end because of bad sex, now if they had known it would be that way I'm pretty sure they wouldn't have gotten married. For a relationship to work you need both an emotional and physical chemistry, it won't last long if there's only one or the other. Pretty soon someone in the relationship will start looking for someone else to fulfill that other need that's missing in their relationship.

 

[pleang sney]

School and parents should work together to explain to the kids what is really sex and what will be the consequences. Because there are some things that parents are too shy to explain and there are some things that kids are too shy to ask their teachers or someone else.

My parents were from the old school and for them talking about sex was like saying that the house will collapse soon.

Actually, i really like the new program of sex education at school. Because now, child learn really young ( around 9-10 years old) what is what and they know what is the consequences of sex ( like STD, pregnancy, AIDS,..). I still remember the first day my nephew and my niece was coming at my house and told me that they got a sex education and they know how people can make babies. It was really funny, because at the end they told me how it was disgusting even if now they know the anatomy of each other. But like i say this is not because the school talk about it that it mean you can't come back on the subject at home. Like i told my niece and nephew, if they have any questions about it and they don't want to ask their mum or someone else, they know that i'm here.
And then, telling a child that abstinence before marriage is a good thing will be stupid. Because you can't have only one partner in your life! this is a fact. To understand what i mean, just look at people around you. Because for who say that they only got their husband in their life always lie. And this is why, people cheat each other. You can stay eternally with the same partner, but you will always want to try something new in your life and experiment others things with others people. The marriage between 2 people is just a deal for them to stay together and being here for each other in the future ( and no money problem) but it doesn't mean that you will enjoy the sex in your couple.
It's like a girl who say that she will wait 'til she be marry to have sex, look at now, she spend her time to find a new guy in her life only for sex.
Sex is an addiction for some people, and for others this is what make their relationships working. People just have to ask themselves what they need. And this is not because you have sex before marriages that it's a sin.
That's why when you tell your child what is sex, just don't forget to told them HOW and WHY it's important for them to use contraception like codoms, birth controls pills...and this is not because you want to wait before starting to talk about it that mean your child will be always a baby to who you can hide something ( and this is why it's so sad to see in this new century how youngs teenagers are pregnant and got STD).