lamour01
sarNie Egg
i thought this was funny. these are stereotypes but they're still funny.
Are You Hmong?
* If you go to school with rice on your shirt/pants/or shoe.
* When you're in a family of ten or more.
* When you have fake flowers as decoration in your family's living room.
* When you see family pictures hanging all over the living room wall.
*When you see dead animal heads (ex. deer) hanging in the the house somewhere, usually in the living room.
* When you see your brother/sister on the net 24/7.
* When you know one girl with an email that has 'angel' in it...Example: azianangel, babyangel, sweetangel, hahahaangel, ect.
* You go to soccer tournaments where you see guys dressed in suits and carrying an umbrella.
* You go to soccer tournaments and you see little kids sliding down hills on pieces of cardboard they stole from one of the venders.
* You see 4 feet 11 inch Hmong Girls wearing 7 inch foot platform shoes, making them 7 inches taller than her boyfriend ...
* ...and you can fit yourself inside one leg of the pants that her boyfriend is wearing.
* All the Hmong girls you know have taken studio pictures 7 times.
* You have a picture of a friend/cousin/sister/brother OR OF YOURSELF standing next to a tree/bush.
* You and all your friends drive a Toyota or a Honda.
* You know someone who tries to talk about cars but he/she really doesn't know anything about cars.
* You go to church to socialize.
* You know someone who hooked up with his/her boyfriend at church camp when they were 15.
* You have to go to the garden with your mom, but your garden is 15 miles out of town.
* All the Hmong men you know think they can jump.
* All the Hmong men you know think they're a professional soccer/volleyball player.
* You know someone named A, Bee, See, Dee, and Ee.
* There's a knife in the kitchen bigger than the size of your head.
* You can fit yourself and a friend into one of your mom's pots in the kitchen.
* You know who Paradise, Voltage, Sounders & Whyte Shadow are.
* Someone in your family blasts Paradise, Voltage, Sounders or Whyte Shadow from their bedroom 24/7.
* You go on Napster and find Hmong songs to download.
* All your friends major in Computer Science.
* You have at lease one relative living in St. Paul.
* When you grab fast American food for dinner, you come home and you have to eat Hmong food to feel full.
* You love scrambled eggs.
* You love Ramen Noodles.
* You have to eat rice with everything.
* You also have to have 'hov txhob' with everything.
* Your uncle's wife's cousin's brother-in-law's younger sister is married to your mom's sister's husband's nephew's wife's mother's older brother.
* You have old men twice your age trying to hit on you.
* You have a friend who had 3 wedding party celebrations.
* Your friend calls you one day and says, "Come to my wedding tomorrow."
* When you go to someone's house, you open the door and trip over a big pile of shoes.
* You have little brother/sisters who watch Chinese movies over & over & over & over again...
* You have that ONE PERSON in your family who has seen every kung fu movie there is out there.
* Your family have piles & piles of Hmong movies.
* When you squat down in public and don't feel embarrassed.
* You go to New Years just to eat now.
* You've dyed/permed/straightened your hair way too many time already to keep count.
* You have a pair of New Wave shirt/pants still in your closet or in the basement somewhere...
* You have at least one picture of yourself with BIG, HIGH ASS HAIR-DO.
* You still listen to New Wave, just for memories.
* You drink soda with dinner.
* You bathe only once a week...twice if you think you're really dirty.
* You have never once said 'I love you' to your parents because you don't want to embarrass yourself or them.
* You think it's a waste of time to wrap gifts, so you just present the gift in a Walmart plastic bag.
* You think it's okay to wear slippers to the grocery store.
* You have 30K sitting in the bank, but your son doesn't have a winter jacket.
* You have teeshirts in every color of the rainbow.
* You ran out of shampoo for your hair, so you use Zest until there's someone buys more.
* Everybody gets so embarrassed when you & family are all watching tv together & you've accidentally witnessed two people kissing on tv.
* You can call any stranger with the same last name as you, 'your cousin'.
* You used to sleep with ALL of your brothers & sisters & parents in the same bed at one time or another.
* You don't change your bed sheets for months at a time.
* You only do laundry once a month.
* You don't have enough bedrooms in your house for everybody.
* You eat 'pho at home, go eat 'pho at restaurants and yet you never get tired of it.
* You stare at other Asians, wondering if they're Hmong too.
-Your 7 food groups consists of chicken, pork, chicken, pork, chicken, chicken, and pork.
-Everytime a slammed car drives by, you HAVE to look at it. (or look who's in it)
-You hate General Vang Pao.
-General Vang Pao hates you.
-Your grandparent starts sniffing back tears as visions of Laos comes up on the Discovery Channel.
-When someone with the same last name as you registers to your all white school, someone asks you if they're your brother.
-Strangers ask you to translate their name into your language and you have to make up some fake jibbery name.
-You think Club2000 is the shitznitz.
-You've dedicated a KLS song to your girlfriend once.
-You've dedicated a Voltage song to your girlfriend once.
-You have a homepage on the web with all your "homies" pictures in it.
-You go to the soccer tournament and slip on a piece of styrafoam or water bottle.
-You're parking your car at the soccer tournament and a chicken bone flies past you.
-You see your cousins eating dinner on the sidewalk at the tournament.
-You keep on eating your papaya salad, no matter if you're dying from the hotness of it already.
-Your family doesn't eat breakfast.
-When you go out to eat, you NEVER order dessert.
-Boiled chicken tastes good on the road.
-You only go to the tournament to eat now.
-You're either a volleyball player, basketball player, or some import car freak wannabe.
-You either shop at Contempo's or Gadzooks.
-When your teacher starts talking about some asian person, everyone turns to look at you.
-When all hope fails in finding a wife, you go to Laos and drag back a 16 year old.
-You have a thick photo album of all your "homies"
-You wake up at 3 am to go fishing.
-You go to the funeral home to either use the phone or to get free food.
-You hate Mel Gibson for killing Jet Li in Lethal Weapon 4.
-You go see "Romeo Must Die" and the theatre is full of hmong families or either black people.
-Your eyes are blue or either green, although they're really brown.
-You have to go to your aunts house to help "cook"
-You either got married at age 13 or started a family by age 18.
-You had to marry your boyfriend because the condom broke.
-You had to marry your girlfriend because you took her home too late.
Are You Hmong?
* If you go to school with rice on your shirt/pants/or shoe.
* When you're in a family of ten or more.
* When you have fake flowers as decoration in your family's living room.
* When you see family pictures hanging all over the living room wall.
*When you see dead animal heads (ex. deer) hanging in the the house somewhere, usually in the living room.
* When you see your brother/sister on the net 24/7.
* When you know one girl with an email that has 'angel' in it...Example: azianangel, babyangel, sweetangel, hahahaangel, ect.
* You go to soccer tournaments where you see guys dressed in suits and carrying an umbrella.
* You go to soccer tournaments and you see little kids sliding down hills on pieces of cardboard they stole from one of the venders.
* You see 4 feet 11 inch Hmong Girls wearing 7 inch foot platform shoes, making them 7 inches taller than her boyfriend ...
* ...and you can fit yourself inside one leg of the pants that her boyfriend is wearing.
* All the Hmong girls you know have taken studio pictures 7 times.
* You have a picture of a friend/cousin/sister/brother OR OF YOURSELF standing next to a tree/bush.
* You and all your friends drive a Toyota or a Honda.
* You know someone who tries to talk about cars but he/she really doesn't know anything about cars.
* You go to church to socialize.
* You know someone who hooked up with his/her boyfriend at church camp when they were 15.
* You have to go to the garden with your mom, but your garden is 15 miles out of town.
* All the Hmong men you know think they can jump.
* All the Hmong men you know think they're a professional soccer/volleyball player.
* You know someone named A, Bee, See, Dee, and Ee.
* There's a knife in the kitchen bigger than the size of your head.
* You can fit yourself and a friend into one of your mom's pots in the kitchen.
* You know who Paradise, Voltage, Sounders & Whyte Shadow are.
* Someone in your family blasts Paradise, Voltage, Sounders or Whyte Shadow from their bedroom 24/7.
* You go on Napster and find Hmong songs to download.
* All your friends major in Computer Science.
* You have at lease one relative living in St. Paul.
* When you grab fast American food for dinner, you come home and you have to eat Hmong food to feel full.
* You love scrambled eggs.
* You love Ramen Noodles.
* You have to eat rice with everything.
* You also have to have 'hov txhob' with everything.
* Your uncle's wife's cousin's brother-in-law's younger sister is married to your mom's sister's husband's nephew's wife's mother's older brother.
* You have old men twice your age trying to hit on you.
* You have a friend who had 3 wedding party celebrations.
* Your friend calls you one day and says, "Come to my wedding tomorrow."
* When you go to someone's house, you open the door and trip over a big pile of shoes.
* You have little brother/sisters who watch Chinese movies over & over & over & over again...
* You have that ONE PERSON in your family who has seen every kung fu movie there is out there.
* Your family have piles & piles of Hmong movies.
* When you squat down in public and don't feel embarrassed.
* You go to New Years just to eat now.
* You've dyed/permed/straightened your hair way too many time already to keep count.
* You have a pair of New Wave shirt/pants still in your closet or in the basement somewhere...
* You have at least one picture of yourself with BIG, HIGH ASS HAIR-DO.
* You still listen to New Wave, just for memories.
* You drink soda with dinner.
* You bathe only once a week...twice if you think you're really dirty.
* You have never once said 'I love you' to your parents because you don't want to embarrass yourself or them.
* You think it's a waste of time to wrap gifts, so you just present the gift in a Walmart plastic bag.
* You think it's okay to wear slippers to the grocery store.
* You have 30K sitting in the bank, but your son doesn't have a winter jacket.
* You have teeshirts in every color of the rainbow.
* You ran out of shampoo for your hair, so you use Zest until there's someone buys more.
* Everybody gets so embarrassed when you & family are all watching tv together & you've accidentally witnessed two people kissing on tv.
* You can call any stranger with the same last name as you, 'your cousin'.
* You used to sleep with ALL of your brothers & sisters & parents in the same bed at one time or another.
* You don't change your bed sheets for months at a time.
* You only do laundry once a month.
* You don't have enough bedrooms in your house for everybody.
* You eat 'pho at home, go eat 'pho at restaurants and yet you never get tired of it.
* You stare at other Asians, wondering if they're Hmong too.
-Your 7 food groups consists of chicken, pork, chicken, pork, chicken, chicken, and pork.
-Everytime a slammed car drives by, you HAVE to look at it. (or look who's in it)
-You hate General Vang Pao.
-General Vang Pao hates you.
-Your grandparent starts sniffing back tears as visions of Laos comes up on the Discovery Channel.
-When someone with the same last name as you registers to your all white school, someone asks you if they're your brother.
-Strangers ask you to translate their name into your language and you have to make up some fake jibbery name.
-You think Club2000 is the shitznitz.
-You've dedicated a KLS song to your girlfriend once.
-You've dedicated a Voltage song to your girlfriend once.
-You have a homepage on the web with all your "homies" pictures in it.
-You go to the soccer tournament and slip on a piece of styrafoam or water bottle.
-You're parking your car at the soccer tournament and a chicken bone flies past you.
-You see your cousins eating dinner on the sidewalk at the tournament.
-You keep on eating your papaya salad, no matter if you're dying from the hotness of it already.
-Your family doesn't eat breakfast.
-When you go out to eat, you NEVER order dessert.
-Boiled chicken tastes good on the road.
-You only go to the tournament to eat now.
-You're either a volleyball player, basketball player, or some import car freak wannabe.
-You either shop at Contempo's or Gadzooks.
-When your teacher starts talking about some asian person, everyone turns to look at you.
-When all hope fails in finding a wife, you go to Laos and drag back a 16 year old.
-You have a thick photo album of all your "homies"
-You wake up at 3 am to go fishing.
-You go to the funeral home to either use the phone or to get free food.
-You hate Mel Gibson for killing Jet Li in Lethal Weapon 4.
-You go see "Romeo Must Die" and the theatre is full of hmong families or either black people.
-Your eyes are blue or either green, although they're really brown.
-You have to go to your aunts house to help "cook"
-You either got married at age 13 or started a family by age 18.
-You had to marry your boyfriend because the condom broke.
-You had to marry your girlfriend because you took her home too late.