*ice*: wow....i've said all that and it's still not enough?! just feeling a little bit better still? hhmm.....well don't feel bad okie dokie! kymmy will be here to cheer you up...woohoo! :yahoo: and give you lots of *huggies* when you need them......oh yeah....i forgot my tissue box...WAIT...hold up a sec, ok...running to get some.....tripped...*ouch* that's going to hurt...ok....YAY...finally! ok...*whew*...here you go. hold up while i take a break to gather some air...haha! hope you feel better though *ice* *BIG HUGS*
Thooka: why are you so blue? all that lingerie yesterday didn't cheer you up or what? hehe.....gosh thooka..one day of not being able to talk to you was torture for me because i live for your jokes and your touch....Oh wait! did i just say that out loud? haha....well don't be confused and lonely girl.....maybe we can be miserable together....here i'll go pop some popcorn and maybe we can watch some comedy to cheer us up...yeah? anywho...love you my sexy thooka! and would you stop exposing yourself to the world please because kymmy's kinda getting a wee bit jealous..lol! you're mine girl and pee too....i just claimed her...muahahaha! *hugs* & *smooches*
kymmy, baby, you know i need a daily dosage of you...not just one hit. your words are like handcuff jingles to my ears...so don't think ur sexy whispers lack to knock at the chambers of my heart. hahaha
...super tannnnk qqqq for caring so mush. i don't know what i would do if i didn't have u guys at sw...to dump all my misery on. lmao jk
i mean, i'm alone right now...my family is far away. and it is just now that i'm realizing i need them more than ever...maybe it's because i'm so use to them?? i don't know. we never really talked much or expressed much as a family but "seeing" them there always brushed me up with a sense of comfort. especially right now, when i need someone familiar...not necessarily someone i can talk to. but just someone i can see, then feel the ease of "being".
for the most part, i AM a loner...
...but you know...it all changes when u bring a significant other into ur life...obviously. the things that happen between u and ur significant other makes u realize that u need someone more than ever. u realize these things in both, the positive AND negative light. the only difference is that the negative light leaves u feeling empty. YET!! the funny thing is...ur NOT empty! ur internal walls bear so much more burden than any heavy weight that could crush a car. and then u think, how can "emptiness" carry so much?
i KNOW now, from "these" feelings, that physical, mental and emotional distress has it's own status in each and every one of us. no matter how much we like being emotionally self-dependent, it all morphs once we bring "someone" into our hearts. and ultimately, our mentality and the things we physically do morphs too. even everything THEY do, everything THEY say...no matter how big or small, can injure us much deeper than they know...deeper that WE, ourselves, know.
i may think that i can rely on myself, but my emotions may tell me otherwise. in trying to look on the bright side of things...and in trying to rationalize for the circumstance, i need to realize that my emotions WILL interfere with the logic. that's why i'm here releasing my burdens in words. it's better than doing something stupid like going out and getting drunk. i don't want alcohol to be my support. this is not an occasion...it's just a part of being a human being. and i have to face it. i won't torture myself by keeping it all in. i need to let go.
i will continue to express myself on general terms. to a certain extent, i would like to keep this a personal matter. no names will be mentioned...only emotions and feelings.
plus, it's not as bad as it sounds. i just want to make sure there's no inkling of these feelings left to pain me further.
whatever doesn't kill us only makes us stronger, right? (although, know that i am running on very minimal breaths right now).
as far as my new bras and panties are concerned...yes, all 14 bras and 17 panties...i guess it will have to be solely for myself...unless u want to come over and share it with me, kymmy baby. hahaha
h34r: 
