My First Thought Upon Waking Up..Today..

ijohn

ijohn

sarNie Adult
... i have this problem and i can't sleep to day,,,night or what ever the hell time it is...lol... when i put away my emotions i see a lot of things i don't want to see inside of ppl... but my friend is right we all seem to fall for the same kind of ppl and we lie to ourselves and tell ourselves it is different... in the end the same traits we find in those we admire(call it love or what ever) are the same when we find time to see clearly,,, they are the traits we have within ourselves we hate the most... with enough lies we tell ourselves we can make ourselves more lovable to the one that matters most because we just can't love our selves on somedays... does love really exist??? i don't think so,,, but dam it feels good when we can accept life through someone else's eyes if just for a little while to find acceptance and happiness thats only an illusion we create because after all we are all alone and choose that way in the end because the scars time inflicts don't really heal us but just cover the nerves so we can be like everyone we think we love... including ourselves... its better to love then not at all or is it just better to accept ourselves the way we are and find peace??? hmmmmmmmmmmmmm me morning rants in the dark i always find myself in...lmao...islh... :ph34r:
 
KhoOnxNouxWanxJai

KhoOnxNouxWanxJai

Staff member
I felt so much better today .. even though I had a splitting headache .. but mood wise I'm good :) sighs thanks to my little loser hahah
 
KhoOnxNouxWanxJai

KhoOnxNouxWanxJai

Staff member
In a Very Very Angry Mood grRRR for this morning .. Woke up at 5 am got online for a bit then a friend called .. fell asleep at around 7 amish and woke up 30 minutes later and went with my sister somewhere yawns im so tired =x
 
ijohn

ijohn

sarNie Adult
... the long winter is stealing the air breath... i just want to sleep and wake in the spring... i'm tired of everything that can't make me laugh... i need to give up... and find my sleep till it's time to wake??? :ph34r:
 
jensen

jensen

sarNie Fansubber
a hug maybe Pleasure? hug someone u like to feel the warmth ... lol...........Anyways, my first thought, i dun think, no brain me...
 
ijohn

ijohn

sarNie Adult
love' why does it haunt us in the night and pasteurize us during the day??? is there really such a thing in one heart.??? is it that we are alone in spite of all the successes people think we have??? what does a weary heart seek when we think we have someones attention??? is it more then friendship??? do all our failures make friends our victims of our broken heart that feels alone??? why do we feel this way some days??? is its because we are or have we been the victim of others needs??? hmmmmmmmmmmmmm i ponder why life is... :(
 
ijohn

ijohn

sarNie Adult
... a friend...why can't i sleep... well i know why but can't say atm... it's sad... i want to warn them but i can't... she will find out soon i think...curiosity with human nature and ppl's behavior can extract a toll on your soul when confidence is broken... just be careful if you are good at this game you will see the person i see soon... ok i need to hop along and sleep or pretend too... damn i wanna close my eyes... :mellow:
 
ijohn

ijohn

sarNie Adult
the silence that i project on others because i fall sort of my dreams... but i have some big goals in life but never the right reason to propel me to succeed...anywhoo i was thinking of that wabbit and all the smiles i need atm but one will do because i need to be happy if just for ftm i feel i'm not alone... when i wake in the past--- :)
 
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